ice-blue mercury glow on my breath's fog and sparkling in an arched urine stream. i've never been mesmerized by a urine stream. not until tonight that is. LOOK UP no stars. hrmph. LOOK DOWN dew. oak leaves. leaves that i know should be burning red but the mercury light has turned them a deep lavender CRUNCH CRUNCH how pleasing is this? CRUNCH CRUNCH chilling little night this is. oh god, what is this night. what are my coordinates why is my spine… CRUNCH CRUNCH ZIP BREATH one year since my last breath of such cold air i thought i'd be so frightened… but it's never been so comforting and the nostalgia is so warming, unlike usual and even the emptiness is so familiar like i've gone beyond some point some invisible line drawn in the sands of my life and beyond the grave whispers "it's too late…" BREATH this has become all too familiar territory emptiness is now my comrade, my patron but it's just that certain place…you know. not everywhere, just…..that place. SIGH no stars BREATH The buffer for sending…..love….it's streaming The receiving…that's a long since forgotten road if i had a cigarette i'd light it and fill something inside me. i'll just go through the motions like some movie star. like james dean. fingers to my lips in an exaggerated manner inhale air and exhale that same familiar fog flip my collar up and tilt my head at the cloud cover waiting for an object. something. maybe a comet to fall to my feet. i'd pick it up and bounce it from hand to hand like a hot potato and blow on it. stick it in my pocket. maybe give it to that person. or throw it. as far as i can. over a fence. CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH